Reflecting on my New Year’s Resolution; The Strenuous Life.
“In speaking to you, men of the greatest city of the West, men of the State which gave to the country Lincoln and Grant, men who pre-eminently and distinctly embody all that is most American in the American character, I wish to preach, not the doctrine of ignoble ease, but the doctrine of the strenuous life, the life of toil and effort, of labor and strife; to preach that highest form of success which comes, not to the man who desires mere easy peace, but to the man who does not shrink from danger, from hardship, or from bitter toil, and who out of these wins the splendid ultimate triumph.
A life of ignoble ease, a life of that peace which springs merely from lack either of desire or of power to strive after great things, is as little worthy of a nation as of an individual. I ask only that what every self-respecting American demands from himself and from his sons shall be demanded of the American nation as a whole. Who among you would teach your boys that ease, that peace, is to be the first consideration in their eyes-to be the ultimate goal after which they strive?” — Theodore Roosevelt
As 2020 comes to a close I wish to reflect on my New Year’s Resolution; to live a strenuous life. Before this year, I had never made a New Year’s Resolution before as I simply did not believe in them as a concept. For a reason I can not recall, I decided 2020 would be different and devoted myself to walking a hard and less traveled road. As I write these words, some may mistake this for a misguided attempt at a sort of machismo, but it is not. By living a hard life, I hoped to learn something and to value the things in life that are commonly taken for granted. I used to — and sometimes still do — put myself in dangerous situations commonly because I believe only then, do you really learn anything about yourself. As another example, I now believe in doing at least one thing that sucks every day — whether that means doing physical exercise or having uncomfortable conversations — not because I feel it makes me into a man, whatever the fuck that means anyway, but because it builds character and makes one into a better human being. All too often in modern society, do we sit around in the luxury of our urban and suburban homes and bitch and moan out of the selfish luxury of abundance. I didn’t — and don’t -want to be that way so I set out to live the strenuous life.
So what have I done this year to live the hard way and to teach myself?
Self-Reliance in the Maine Mountains
“I’m the one who’s got to die when it’s time for me to die, so let me live my life the way I want to.” — Jimi Hendrix
By far the largest effort to not shirk the hard life was moving into the Northern Appalachian Mountains of Maine. This has been an idea in my head for years but was executed upon in 2020 because I decided that I was going to live life on my own terms, not according to someone else’s expectations of me.
I wished to build my own shelter, but I, unfortunately, found out that I lacked the proper resources to do so. Mainly, I faced the constraint of time. At the time of the initial action to look for land, I had only a month and a half before the ground would freeze in Maine. A bigger barrier still, I work in the technology industry — everyone has to pay their master sometime; I have yet found out how to escape that monkey on my back. To that end, I found myself with more money than time. These two factors led me to begrudgingly accept my fate of buying a cabin that someone else had built. I did not wish to shirk the hardness of building an encampment myself and the lessons it would teach me about life, but reality pointed my direction.
To make a long story shorter, I eventually found a cabin on top of a small mountain — around 1,600 feet — in the Northern Appalachian Mountains and set about learning the art of self-reliance. Now, before I continue too far, I should mention that I still own a conventional condominium that allows for an easy life — so I don’t get too much credit! I am simply one step removed from Henry David Thoreau and I mean that as much of an insult to myself as Thoreau — but back to self-reliance.
During my time at the cabin, I have learned to be more self-reliant. I have stopped short of killing my own food, but have learned to live off the land; making my own furniture out of trees, learning to shoot accurately and precisely as I can, generating power from the sun, and tolerating the extremely cold temperatures found on top of a small mountain in Northern Maine — mornings, where I live, can be as cold as -20 degrees Fahrenheit and at the top of a mountain, the wind is another factor. I did this, not because I felt it was needed to prove my worth to the world or because I wanted some sort of prize, but because I forced me to live the hard way — without the modern conveniences that turn us into sloths, content to wither away into nothingness in front of political gossip and reality TV. I am still learning to live off the land so this story is very much to be continued; I have learned a lot about myself from the solitude and labor of living the hard way in the mountains, but I have much more to learn.
As I contemplate my next outdoorsman skill to embark upon, I am thinking about learning long-range marksmanship….
Physical Stress (Types II and III Fun)
We should ask ourselves in every situation, “what is this teaching me?” Suffering in itself is one of the best teachers in the world! The point of physical strain is to break yourself down — both your body and in many cases your, mind — so you can begin to look at yourself and make yourself into a better person. It may sound a bit odd, but making yourself intentionally suffer is good for you and physical exertion is a great way to accomplish that. I’m not going to cite any specific examples of physical stress, but in 2020, I tried to physically challenge my body whenever I could, even if it ended in signs of over-exertion. I found it not only to be a great reliever of stress during an otherwise turbulent year but a character builder that helped me refocus other aspects of my life.
Mental Training
I know what you’re thinking, and no. I’m not gonna sit here and tell you that I intentionally tortured myself mentally. That would make me a crazy person, and although it might seem like at this point, I’m not one of those — hopefully! In 2020, I cultivated a daily meditation practice completely with breathwork and stretching.
As any avid meditator will tell you, waking up early is part of meditation. To that end, I began waking up early to meditate. I am also a strong believer in the disconnection between nature and “modern, civilized” man, so regardless of weather, my mediation practice is outside. Meditating in nature every morning helps me recenter on reality instead of the made-up and pre-fabricated society of money and material possessions we pretend to live in.
Starting a meditation practice was not easy for me to begin with. Much inclined to sleep in, I was lazy and not at all enamored with the idea of waking up early. Over time though, I became used to it and then addicted to it. I say addicted because I get to experience 15–30 minutes of complete peace on solitude every day — no matter how busy or stressful my day gets. Daily meditation continues to be part of my life and is, I believe, another example of choosing the hard, but the more rewarding path in life.
Finding a New Job
This one really wasn’t in my control, so I don’t know if I can take credit for it, but in the latter portion of 2020, I got laid off in the midst of a pretty economically turbulent time. Finding a new job wasn’t a simple process and often resulted in depression and feelings of complete hopelessness, but I kept pushing. The one thing that matters in life is that you do not stop; ever. I eventually found another job before the Christmas holiday. I was unemployed for around a month. I’ll give myself a healthy pat on the back for dogging ahead with willpower, but I didn’t intend to live the hard way with this one.
Starting a Podcast
“Great, another thing to do…”, is what I thought to myself when approached with the idea of starting a podcast — and sometimes I still feel that way. For me, starting a podcast was work — I often describe myself as a very lazy person in that I don’t often involve myself in activities out of pure laziness. We think of the word “lazy” and negative, but I don’t believe that’s true. I don’t fight or get into arguments with people because I am essentially too lazy to do so — I would rather just walk away and take the path of least resistance.
Anyhow, starting a podcast was something that I didn’t actually want to do — it took convincing. There was a need for someone to talk about topics related to mental health openly, so I did it. I can’t say as the podcast is very popular, but I also don’t care. One, because I’m too lazy to make anything popular (I’m a marketer by trade, I’m sure I could make it popular), but also because I want to be true to my personal message.
I’ve learned a lot of things creating the podcast too, and maybe that’s the biggest reward. I’ve talked to a bunch of people who have some super interesting ideas on how to live and be true to themselves. Another example of living a strenuous life, but not in the way one might expect. I’m sure Teddy Roosevelt didn’t have podcasting in mind when he gave his speech!
What’s Left to Do?
Skills to Learn
There are many skills that I have yet to learn to live a more strenuous life. As mentioned earlier, I would like to learn long-range marksmanship. I figure that any idiot can shoot something that is <100 yards, but it takes specialized skill to be able to shoot a target at about 1,000 yards reliably. I also want to learn about edible plants in the northeast for survival purposes. My father knew a man who would be able to walk out of his house with nothing on his person but a pocket knife, and survive alone in the woods. As someone who typically carries more gear than is necessary (but hey, if you’ve got a broken leg, I gotchu!), I think I’d like to learn how to do that in 2021 — or at least move more towards it, anyway.
Someday, I would like to become a game warden. I see the game warden as the pinnacle of hard living and outdoorsman expertise. Becoming a warden isn’t something that I can expect to do in 2021, but it is something I can start working towards. In 2021, I will try to learn about outdoor activities I do not personally engage in. I would like to challenge myself to join a volunteer search and rescue team in 2021 and that will start preparing me to be a game warden.
Things to See and Do
I would like to see wild buffalo and mustangs. Being a northeasterner, I have yet to actually see either of these things in person. To me there’s something free about the idea of wild mustangs running across the plains — it’s the stuff of dreams. I would like to try my hand at primitive camping in other biomes as well — for instance, I would like to go to the Caribbean and go camping on Dry Tortugas National Park — an island accessible by boat only, 70 miles west of Key West, Florida. I’m sure there are more things I could think of in this category, but for the purposes of brevity, I’ll stop there. As most of my audience knows, I am a full believer in type II and III fun and in 2021, I would like to have more of that.
….
I think that about wraps it up for me. While I think I’ll keep on trying to live a more strenuous life, I don’t know if I’ll make another new year’s resolution. I guess I’ll have to see if this muse strikes me on that. I don’t want to be so arrogant as to grade myself on the fulfillment of my overall goal so I’ll leave that up to you, the reader, to determine. As always, love each other out there, do you, be happy, keep on truckin’!
